Tomo stars in: A midsummer night's disaster
by phantom.ryder
Summary: Yukari has another off week and decides to unsettle her class in the cruelest of ways.. forced drama presentations! As expected, crazy azumadness runs rampant throughout. Hope you all enjoy it XD I can almost guarantee a laugh or two.


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Disclaimer: I claim no ownership of characters used. All are licensed to their respective owners. I am not making any money through authorship of this fic.

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Miss Yukari's class sat nervously in their seats as their homeroom teacher walked in and started writing something on the blackboard.

It had been a while since something ridiculous had happened to them and Miss Yukari had looked increasingly bored during the past few days.

Since it was a Friday, The Takino wildcat had predicted that their teacher would crack and make them do something odd again. It truly seemed that this time, Tomo was right.

Out of everyone in the class, Yomi looked the most nervous as she felt that if Tomo was right about something, the state of the world as she knew it would surely collapse. Unfortunately for Yomi, Tomo's prediction wasn't the only one to come true.

"Right," Yukari began. "I'm bored of teaching language again so I proclaim this week 'Shakespeare Week!' I expect you all to break into groups, rehearse, practice, do whatever as long as at the end of the week your group has something to present to the class. Got it?"

The class stared at her blankly.

"Ok good!" she said before laying her head down on her desk for a good nap.

The class then broke out into nervous conversation and started guessing what had gotten Miss Yukari into this mood. Most of the votes went either in the direction of 'she lost her wallet', 'another one of her friends have gotten engaged', or the front-runner, 'she just likes to mess with our minds'.

--

Each of the girls, as to be expected, had different reactions to this sudden news.

Tomo, who thought that Shakespeare was a type of fruit, looked sufficiently confused.

Chiyo-chan and Osaka looked excited. The latter, oddly enough, apparently had some sort of penchant when it came to stage performances.

Kagura and Sakaki both took the announcement in their stride as they usually did with everything as long as it didn't interfere with athletics or the ended in the destruction of anything cute.

Yomi on the other hand, took it the worst out of all them. She sat at her desk both shocked and appalled at the situation.

"Dra..Drama? Me? Perform?"

"Perform?," asked Tomo.

"Perform what? I don't understand! What's pears got to do with performing anything? Do we have to eat them in front of people? Hey Osaka! It's an eating contest! Aren't you excited?"

Osaka shook her head.

"No Tomo, it's not an eatin' contest. It's theatre."

"Theatre? As in hospital? As in they want us to operate?"

"As in you're an idiot Tomo," said Yomi.

She was upset but she wasn't about to get away with a remark as weird as that one.

"Actually Tomo, the theatre that Miss Osaka meant was more along the lines of performance art. We take a scene from a play, learn the lines, get dressed up and perform it to the class."

"Oh! So it's like Cosplay?"

"Wow Tomo," said Kagura. "You must really like _Lupin the third _huh?"

"Of course!" I look just like Fujiko don't I?"

"Umm, no?" the athlete replied.

Tomo took serious offence to that comment and had raised her arm to strike.

The moment after that she found herself on the ground with a red circle mark on her forehead and a piece of chalk lying next to her.

"Tomo.. shh. Fight later. Sleep now," said Yukari from her desk.

Kagura looked impressed.

"What a pitching arm… ten points Yukari!" said the athlete.

The teacher raised her arm as thanks for the complement and armed herself with another piece of chalk for the next troublemaker. Quite an impressive feat for someone who had her eyes closed the whole time.

"Hey. Should we choose which Shakespeare play to do a scene out of?" asked Osaka. "Then we can decide which of us will perform which jobs."

"You seem to know a lot about it Osaka," Yomi said.

"Drama was one of my favourite subjects after bread eatin' contests."

"Miss Osaka that's not a subject…"

"Sure it was."

"Geez Osaka, What kind of school did you go to?" asked Yomi.

Chiyo-chan cleared her throat.

"Should we start now?"

"Sure!" said Osaka, excited once again.

"I'll be Fujiko!," said Tomo.

"You be stage crew," said Yomi.

"Stage crew? We don't have a stage. We have the front of the class room," Kagura stated

Miss Yukari's ears twitched.

"Oh yeah. I forgot to say earlier… the principal got mad at me for being so slack with my work so I accidentally told him my students were working on an extensive project that would blow his mind. So… the best group gets to perform in front of the entire year at the gymnasium and all members of that group gets a 100 percent grade for my class."

The Knuckleheads suddenly had an air of determination about them.

"We will do this!" they said together.

"Do what? What will you do? And more importantly, what kind of trouble will it cause me?" Yomi asked hurriedly.

"No trouble! All we'll do is win of course!" said Tomo confidently. "Then we'll all get hundreds for Yukari's class! And get to shine in front of the entire year!"

Yomi lay her head on her desk.

"Tomo, there's no Fujiko in Shakespeare," she said. 'And there's absolutely no justice in the world.' She added in her head.

Sakaki, who had been quiet up until now decided to speak up.

"A midsummer nights dream. We can do a midsummer nights dream."

Osaka nodded.

"I've done that at my old school! I still have some of the costumes at home I think. What made you pick that one Sakaki?"

"… There's, not much blood in that one…" she said.

Tomo looked disappointed.

--

The next day the troupe met up at Chiyo-chan's house, as there was the most room there. Osaka brought along a large box filled with costumes she had previously used.

"Geez Osaka, you weren't kidding with that whole favourite subject thing huh? There's everything we need here," Kagura said as she surveyed the contents of the box.

"Yup. They should all be good sizes too. I altered some of 'em last night."

Tomo made a beeline for the box as soon as Osaka put it down and immediately pulled out one of the swords inadvertently hitting Kagura in the process.

"Tomo you moron that hurt!"

"Oh did I hit you? Sorry…wait I mean, raise up your own sword villain! I shall strike thee down!" she said with a few slashes of the sword, the last hitting Kagura again.

"Tomo put the damn sword down!" the athlete said incensed.

"Are you impressed with my use of appropriate language? I read up on it last night," Tomo said proudly.

"Here we go… Tomo seems to have found some motivation from somewhere again. Exactly like the time she decided to go to the same high school as me." Yomi mused as she watched Kagura chase the wildcat around with a sword of her own in hand.

"In that case our group should do really well!" Chiyo-chan said happily before bounding off to get Mr. Tadakichi and riding in on him.

"Look Mr. Tadakichi can be a pony!" she said with a giggle.

"Chiyo that's adorable!" Kagura said, forgetting her Tomo induced anger for a moment.

Sakaki just turned red.

"Chiyo-chan you're the king!"

"Huh?" the rest of the girls asked as they turned to Osaka.

"Well there's this one scene, where the king rides in, to find the four lead characters asleep in a glade."

"Oh the king!" said Tomo. "I know him. His name's thesaurus right? What a dumb name."

"Yeah just like Tomo." Said Kagura who had rediscovered her previous anger.

"His name is Theseus," said Sakaki. "I read it again last night as well."

"Me too." Admitted Kagura and Yomi together.

"Well anyway that guy, thesaurus." Tomo continued.

"He's angry cos this girl won't marry the guy her father picks. She goes off and falls in love with someone else I mean, big no no in that kingdom. But anyway in the end he realises that he'll go with true love and lets her marry who she wants."

"Wow Shakespeare in ten seconds. Very succinct Tomo."

"Why thank you!"

"God she doesn't even know what I meant…"

Osaka then started handing out copies of the play.

"Ok. Everyone turn to Act IV, scene I," she said.

"Hey! Why do you get to be the boss Osaka?"

"I'll be the director Tomo. If you like you can be the lead!"

"Me? Well Miss director, you must recognise talent when you see it."

"I don't disagree at all," said Yomi with a smile. "So when was the last time you saw talent Osaka?"

Sakaki cleared her throat once again.

"I'll be Demetrius. I'm tallest so it would look best on stage if I played a male."

"Is that the lead?" Tomo asked. "Osaka said I could be the lead!"

"You are Tomo." Said Chiyo-chan joining in. "You can be Lysander."

'I thought this idiot had read the play,' thought Yomi with a precision eye-roll.

"Ok then, I'll be Helena," stated Kagura.

"What? Why?" asked Yomi who had just realised which part she would have to play… and with whom.

Tomo put her arms around Yomi's shoulders and read out a line.

"_Fair love, you faint with wandering in the wood;  
And to speak troth, I have forgot our way:  
We'll rest us, Hermia, if you think it good,  
And tarry for the comfort of the day."_

"You guys wanna know what that means?" asked Tomo who, just because she was Tomo, felt the need to show off.

They all stared at her.

"Well it means that the main guy went and got himself and his girlfriend lost in the woods and she's getting pretty tired so they've stopped for a rest."

"Wow, who knew the wildcat idiot could do Shakespeare?" said Kagura.

"No thanks Kagura, I'm not very hungry," Tomo said.

"Not me.." said Yomi with a sigh and a shake of her head. "Ok ok I'll be Hermia."

"Then we're all decided!" said Chiyo-chan before she saw the annoyed look on Osaka's face.

"Tomo! You're on the wrong page!"

"Oops, why so I am.." the wildcat said while scratching the back of her head.

--

A moment later, Osaka had instilled some sort of order into the situation. As odd as that might have seemed to the rest of the girls…

Sakaki, Tomo, Yomi and Kagura lay under Chiyo-chan's tree 'asleep'.

"Ok Chiyo-chan. It's your line."

"Oh ok," Chiyo said before reading her line in the cutest little voice anyone playing a king had ever used.

"_Go, bid the huntsmen wake them with their horns."_

She 'rode in' on Mr. Tadakichi and Osaka blew a whistle to signify horns and get the group to 'wake-up.'

Chiyo-chan continued with her lines.

_"Good morrow, friends. Saint Valentine is past:  
Begin these wood-birds but to couple now?"_

'My God, I can understand about every other word of this stuff.' Thought an uncomfortable Kagura.

Tomo stood and walked over slowly to Chiyo-chan to deliver her line… and so they continued until the very last.

--

_The day of the presentation._

Chiyo-chan had gotten permission from Yukari to bring Mr. Tadakichi to school that day. She even said that he could stay in her room while Chiyo had her other classes, the language teacher seemed to have found a soft spot for him.

Tomo was swinging around her sword again and Kagura, who had borrowed Sakaki's was about to attack Tomo with it.

"What did she do now?" asked Yomi.

Kagura pointed to the red spot on her forehead.

"Oh, well… carry on then," a nervous Yomi said.

Sakaki was in costume, sitting at her desk and trying not to look at Kaorin who was drooling over her from the far side of the room.

A few minutes later, Miss Yukari called intermission over.

"Right ok ok, time for the last group. Let this pain end now," Yukari said while petting Mr. Tadakichi.

Echoes of 'geez Miss Yukari we weren't that bad', and 'wasn't this your idea?' circled the room.

"Yes! It's now my turn to shine! Shine and get the hundred I always knew I was destined for!" yelled the Takino wildcat.

"Osaka! My lines!"

"Your what?"

"Where are my lines?"

"Oh my God," said Yomi.

"Moron Tomo!" said Kagura and pulled Sakaki's sword out of the sheath and began to chase Tomo around the room again.

"You … don't know your lines?" Osaka asked. "I have failed as your director!" she whined.

Bark!

"Shush all of you! You're upsetting the dog!" said Yukari.

The girls were oblivious to her presence.

"Don't worry Miss Yukari… Mr. Tadakichi is just excited, he's used to Tomo," said Chiyo.

"What's the deal Osaka? You're the director it's your job to bring my lines right?" called Tomo as she weaved through her classmates trying to avoid Kagura.

"No Tomo!" said Yomi. "You were supposed to remember them!"

"All of them?!" asked Tomo.

"Miss Yukari do we fail?" Kagura stopped chasing Tomo just long enough to ask the question.

Chiyo-chan teared up at the word 'fail'.

Sakaki saw this and stood up, immediately drawing everyone's attention to her.

She cleared her throat and looked at Chiyo-chan who was dressed in royal garments.

"My King, why do you cry?" she asked when she had walked over and kneeled in front of Chiyo.

Chiyo-chan, not knowing what else to do just pointed at Tomo and Kagura.

"My lady!" Sakaki called to Kagura as she stood. "Please, hand me my sword. I will finish this villain for you."

Tomo shrugged. 'Hey if I can't be the lead, might as well be the villain.'

"You there! Knight! I will finish you off and take this kingdom as my own!"

"Never!" said Yomi from the sidelines. "Sir Sakaki will never let a villain like you live!"

Tomo let out the best villain laugh she could manage. "Mwahahah!"

"I shall strike you down just as I shall strike your maiden."

She raised her arm and 'hit' Kagura who had the foresight to avoid the hit but act like she felt it.

"Sir Sakaki! Save me!" she called.

Sakaki ran to her side and engaged in a fierce 'sword battle' with Tomo. One that of course ended in Tomo losing.

Since this was contrary to the wildcat's natural urges, Kagura had to trip her at the last minute or the battle would have gone on forever.

'Oww Kagura you idiot!'

'You're the villain Tomo, just stay down moron!'

Chiyo then stood up and bowed to Sakaki who again kneeled down in front of her.

"My dear Knight. You have saved my Kingdom. How could I ever repay you?"

Chiyo then caught a glimpse of Mr. Tadakichi and smiled.

"I know! I will bestow upon you the most prized steed in the land and the hand of my only daughter."

Yomi and Osaka, and the very well trained Tadakichi took this as their cue.

Yomi gave Sakaki her hand and Mr. Tadakichi stood by Sakaki's side while Osaka stood at the front with a book open in her hands.

"By the powers vested in me by the great King Chiyo-chan, I pronounce you…"

"No!!!" yelled Kaorin from the back until a piece of chalk came hurtling towards her.

"Carry on Osaka," said Yukari.

"Uh.. ok…"

("Oh my God Kaorin are you ok? Can you hear me?," Chihiro could be heard asking in the background.)

"I pronounce you.." Osaka continued.

A faint 'noooo' could still be heard.

"Stay down Kaorin!" called Kagura.

"Just freaking marry them already Osaka." Said Tomo.

"I pronounce you, Sir Sakaki and Lady Yomi."

Sakaki then bowed to Yomi and escorted her lady and steed to their seats.

--

The class was silent for a moment before breaking out into applause. Yukari was wiping a tear from her eye.

Nyamo who stood at the door with her class also applauded.

"Wow, Yukari. Did you teach them how to act? That was amazing! We heard it through the walls."

Mr. Kimura poked his head through the door.

"I missed high school girls fighting!" he said before running away, much to everyone's relief.

--

When the applause had died down and it was time for the girls to head to their next class, Yukari handed them each a piece of paper.

"Wooooh!!" yelled Tomo. "Hundreds for Tomo and to think if I hadn't forgotten my lines we wouldn't have.. uh.. guys? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Sakaki, sword," said Kagura.

"Aaaah!" cried the wildcat as she ran through the halls.

The rest of the girls sat down at their desks.

"I think that went well," mused Sakaki.

"Me too, thanks to you," said a smiling Chiyo.

"Coulda been worse," said Osaka.

They all looked at Yomi who stayed quiet for a moment.

"I hope Kagura gets her good," she said with a smirk.

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AN: I hope you guys enjoyed that! It was awesome fun to write XD thanks very much for reading and please review if you can spare a minute!!

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